It was a very hard thing for me to hear, a family at my church informed an elder that they were leaving our church, and I was the reason.

They told the elder that they knew me and communicated something completely untrue about me but made me the reason for their departure nonetheless.  It took a day but I was able to talk to them.  A lot of emotion was involved, it was explained to me that there were OTHER reasons for them leaving the church, though I don’t think those reasons were told to the elder they spoke to.  I even offered to leave the church if they would stay, but they weren’t going to come back.  I spent the better part of the day crushed – I had failed to keep my promise to my Pastor to not allow my being transgender to be an issue for those at the church.

Before you go off saying “good riddance to them” or “don’t let the door hit you on the way out”, THIS is exactly why people need to be at church, to understand that Jesus never got up and left the table because He didn’t like who he was sitting with.  I was even debating leaving the church so it wouldn’t happen again.  I went to my spiritual mom (my 24/7 – 360 degree source of wisdom) asking for a reason why I SHOULDN’T leave my church and well of course, she gave me one.  But something else she said I want to pass on to you, she said “I may be the reason why they left the church, but I’m not RESPONSIBLE for them leaving the church.”

When people reject you because of who you are, this is THEIR choice

When people reject you because of who you are, this is THEIR choice.  When they choose to leave your church because of you, this is THEIR choice.  All we can do is pray that ALL of us as Christians can do a better job of learning to be like Jesus (and yes, that’s a TALL order indeed) and do a better job of being His disciples.  In Ephesians 4:1-6 the Apostle Paul says “As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called; one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.”

You ARE a Christian and there are no other qualifications for being a part of the Body of Christ. So, being a part of the same body, what exactly are they trying to say in their leaving? I don’t want to be a part of a body that has a body part like you? Bearing with one another in love requires a much higher standard of behavior than that. They can’t “bless you” with their mouths and then curse you by walking away and call that love. We all need to learn that the BODY of Christ has many parts.  It may be a wart, it may be a broken finger, it may be a bloody nose, but we are all part of the same body.  Let’s teach each other to and learn to embrace ALL the parts of Christ’s body.  I recently wrote about my pinky toe – I’m not cutting it off, it’s not going anywhere, it’s just a part of me and it’s along for the ride of “my life” and I hope as Christ’s body we can be willing to take all our “body parts” along for the ride of “our life”.