Many of you have probably found yourself ostracized by your family. For me it was twenty-five years ago when I had made the decision that rather than kill myself, I would transition and have surgery to live authentically as who God made me to be. But that decision did leave me cut-off from my parents and brothers. I was no longer married and had no children, so I was pretty much alone. Read more “NEVER Give Up on Family”
I spent decades trying to deal with what I could only call a curse. How else do you describe being born with the body of one sex and have the internal identity (soul) of the other. Having lived it, I would call it a curse. Read more “I First Thought it Was a Curse, But Now I Know it’s a Gift”
We as just people are so quick to take for granted occasions that at some will never happen again, and we take for granted those once in a lifetime opportunities we have with family. A friend of mine recently posted a picture of her and her dad (visiting from halfway across the country for the holiday) just having a good time at an event and her comment was “Date with the BEST DADDY EVUH!” She and her dad were both just beaming, father and daughter together enjoying each others presence and the time they get to spend together – just the two of them.
My first reaction – tears. Tears because of the pity party I started because not only have I not even spoken to my father in close to 24 years, Read more “Even Alone for the Holidays, You can Bless Another”
It took me a really long time to realize it, the fact that I killed someone – which I did. Killing someone is a horrible thing. The person who dies of course doesn’t have to endure the pain that the friends and loved ones left behind go through. In fact for the one who dies, it might mean the end of pain for them. Read more “Yes, I Killed Someone, But it Was Him or Me!”
Look, I totally get it. You see it in the news – such and such Christian group is against transgender bathroom bills or against some mom letting her little boy present as a girl in school. I get it. You’re crazy out of your mind mad at them. And the next thing you ask is “how could a God be so hateful toward people?” Read more “Don’t Blame God Because People are Jerks!”
There was a commercial on TV several weeks ago with the Olympic swimmer Missy Franklin, she’s very popular, won something like four gold medals at the 2012 Olympics. I’m pretty sure the commercial was based on an actual event and she allowed it to be made into a commercial, God bless her. In the commercial she tearfully read a letter she wrote thanking her family for helping her become the woman she is, for all they had done for her – it was very touching. Read more “It’s Easy to Feel Anger and Hate and Then Look for Who You Should Blame”
The words “identify” and “identity” are frequently used when reading or hearing about being transgender. Don’t confuse the fact that you’re transgender with who you are as a Christian. You’re not perfect, neither am I nor anyone else on Earth, but David says in Psalm 139:14 that God made us in an amazing and wonderful way. Being born a boy or girl but with a body that didn’t match is no less amazing and wonderful, but the Lord doesn’t look at the outside, He looks beyond our bodies. 1 Samuel 16:7 says “People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” The Lord looks at WHO you are, not whether you’re tall or short, white or black, skinny or fat or male or female. Read more “Being Transgender is NOT Your Identity, Your Identity is in Christ”
It was a very hard thing for me to hear, a family at my church informed an elder that they were leaving our church, and I was the reason. Read more “When Someone Leaves Your Church Because of You”
Growing up in a conservative environment when you’re transgender can really mess you up. When I say that, I mean you may be told by people directly if they know you’re transgender or you just may pick it up based on how they react to what they see on the news and in social media or perhaps even hear in church. And here is what you’re being told or inferring from what others say: “God didn’t make you to be that way”, therefore you’re sinning if you decide to transition to the gender you really are or if you’ve already transitioned, continue to live as who you are. I felt that way growing up, and I felt that way as a grownup. I even got married hoping that would help somehow take away what it was that I felt inside. Read more “You Can Stop Condemning Yourself Now”
Now don’t freak out. There are plenty of things in the world that aren’t normal. Being left-handed is not normal. Having red hair is not normal. Being double-jointed isn’t normal. And that’s ok. People may say “oh, I didn’t know you were left-handed” or “you’re double-jointed? Cool!” These are all common enough (and non-threatening) that most people just forget about it and never cared one way or the other.
Then there are those who perhaps were born with physical or mental disabilities, autism, down syndrome, stuttering. Others may later develop symptoms from MS or Parkinson’s. These can sometimes make people in the general population a little uncomfortable. Maybe they feel like they shouldn’t look or they don’t know what to do or say so they tend to avoid those people. Read more “You DO Understand You’re Not Normal Don’t You?”